A friend of mine often asks on Facebook, “Where did you see God today?” Recently I had a clear answer to that question. I saw God in an older gentleman who was grieving at his wife’s grave in the Mitchell Cemetery.
Our home here in Mitchell isn’t far from the Mitchell Cemetery. So, quite often when I take our dog for a walk we’ll go to the cemetery. I’m one of those people that don’t find cemeteries creepy or weird – I suppose that might be a hazard of ministry. In fact, I find it to be a quiet and peaceful place to walk. Quite often I’ll walk the different roads in the cemetery and remember the people that I’ve helped bury in the different sections.
Yesterday I noticed a vehicle stopped in the cemetery and an individual standing by a grave. I’ve seen that car before in the same place. I’ve seen that man before…regularly. He and I have talked before. His wife died several years ago, so this isn’t just a recent loss in his life, but it is still very real. They were married for 60 years and as he states it, he truly misses her every day.
Now I often will talk to people that I find standing or sitting in the cemetery. I’ll ask them if this is a special person they are grieving and to tell me about that person. This has led to some interesting and beautiful conversations. I find that quite often people want to talk about their loved one. Sometimes I’ll identify myself as a local pastor…sometimes not…depending on where the conversation goes.
As I said, I have visited with this gentleman before. He likes Sophie, and of course Sophie is partial to anyone who will give her attention, and this gentleman does. So, he and I chatted about the fall weather and the coming winter. No, he doesn’t go south for the winter. We talked about family a bit. Then it was time to head on our way.
The gentleman thanked me for stopping to talk. He said this is the worst part of the day. There’s no one to talk to at home. We talked a bit more about where he was from and where his wife was from…and how different they were but also how good they were for each other. I mentioned that he has some great memories to hang on to. He nodded and then said something that truly touched me. He said, “Yes, but it’s hard to hug and kiss a memory.”
In those few words God spoke a mighty message. “Keith, have you remembered to hug the people you love? Have you shared words and expressions of love with those who are important to you?” Yes, like so many others think, “I’ve got lots of life still in me…I’ll have the people I love with me for a good long time yet.” But in my mind, I could hear the response this grieving man would have given me, “Yes, but 60 years still isn’t long enough!”
As we approach Thanksgiving, why not take a moment now to “give thanks” for the special people in your life. Are there relationships that need to be repaired?? Maybe you need to take the first step. Is there a loved one you haven’t hugged in a while? Maybe now is the time…you might not have another chance. Life is short.
Anyway, I give thanks for this gentleman I connected with in the cemetery. I pray for God's peace for him. I’m also grateful for how he is reflecting the love of God in his life, even in the midst of grief. May we all take the time to hug and kiss the loved ones we still can. Honey…I’ve got a hug and a kiss for ya!!
Serving Together,
Pastor Keith